Walking Mends My Mind

A Publication by G J Meldrum.

80s & 90s education system: 

Many teachers in the 1980s early 1990s used tactics that would be considered severe bullying, verbal abuse, and most certainly be treated as criminal assault today.

During my school era, the lack of modern safeguarding, and legal protections meant that fear and intimidation were frequently tolerated in schools up and down the country. Certain discipline tools encouraged meant that public humiliation was used as a teaching method, physical and verbal aggression was standard protocol. Corporal Punishment was  abolished in the late 80s but very much still active, with discrimination and cruelty being all too common. 

What were your memories and were they pleasant ones?. As the old saying goes, your school years are supposed to be the best years of your life, although that isn’t the case for everyone and I classify myself in that bracket.

My years in school and what I now look back upon were a failing, archaic education system. If my memories serve me right it was not a pleasant experience. The  penal system as I now call it was something that I can only describe as abuse of power and historic mental trauma that should never have been allowed, with no help, no support, no guidance; does that sound familiar?.

I recall so many troublesome kids at school and the teachers didn’t know how to deal with them. They had problems; they were non-academic some needed a little bit of help, guidance and a little bit of a break, some even used school as a means of escape from whatever horrible shit was going on in there home life.

In no way do I make excuses for the way I was as a kid and I have always taken full responsibility for my mistakes in life. I was no angel and yea probably a bit difficult but Ive always had this nagging feeling, would I have turned out differently if these so-called teachers had honestly given a shit and just asked a few simple questions.

Are you ok?.

Why are you acting this way?.

Is everything ok outside school?.

Is anything bothering you?.

Can I do anything to help?.

At no point in my years at school were any of these questions ever asked. This was meant to be a place of education, compassion and a place you should have been able to ask for help.

Punishment: Was always the default setting and the only way teachers could deal with any sort of behavioural issues. There was no interest in trying to explore or understand why a proportion of pupils behaved the way we did.

Non-academic, not into sports, issues inside school, issues outside school; no one really cared although they were just children who often struggled to adapt to school life and that caused them a problem.

The changes: Looking back from a personal point of view the decline in my schoolwork and the change in my behaviour would have been more than noticeable but nothing was done; instead heavy-handed antics were regularly deployed, and sadly for many this type of behaviour was all too common. Constantly being told you are a waste of space, you will go nowhere in life, you will amount to nothing, this kept ringing in my ears for a hell of a long time. This type of behaviour from an education system was completely disgusting. 

What it taught me: Negativity and hatred towards school and authority were all I really understood from my years at school and unfortunately, I took nothing positive and learned very little from my time at school.

No child is born bad: In life environmental factors, society and upbringing as well as individual choices are the root cause of people’s problems but as a child, you rely on education, and direction. If you were a challenging character no one wanted to know and they sure as hell didn’t want to find out why. So the easiest thing was to ostracise you and have you taken out of mainstream classes and punished. My recollection,  I was frequently forced to sit outside in the corridor or placed in a corner of the classroom looking at the wall for long periods of time as the narcissistic teachers sent out the message to others that you will be made an example of if you do not do as you are told. 

Lochgelly Tawse: Lochgelly was put on the map for being the main manufacturer of the belt in the UK. The belt was officially abolished 1987. Fife and Tayside opted for a gradual phase-out, with Fife enforcing a ban by 1983 and Tayside eliminating it across primary schools by 1984 before the 1987 national ban took effect.

That took the power away from the teachers who were legally allowed to commit acts of violence. That didn’t stop them though throwing items at pupils, pushed and pulled about by teachers and getting poked in the back with sets of keys and the occasional rap on the knuckles with a ruler were some of the things that still went on.

High school was a little bit more structured and diplomatic where you were placed in detention after school and told to fill out I must not misbehave, pointless punishment exercises, or even worse called on a tannoy letting everyone know that you had been in trouble. 

Then off it was to the head teachers office where you were told to sit outside the office until the end of school time; usually what followed was expulsion from school. 

The only object I had thrown at me in High School was from my Art teacher, when he could not get your attention a black board duster was deployed and thankfully he couldn’t throw for toffee.

I also recall being asked regularly to find alternative education, asked if I wanted to go to other schools that were more equipped to deal with the likes of me. WTF does that mean? I didn’t even know who I was myself and I had this bunch of jokers who had already made up their mind that I could not be educated.

I can honestly say that I had had enough I could not take anymore and I accepted the schools offer of finding alternative education and I never returned to school after 3rd year. 

Well I did get invited back to sit my exams at the end of 4th year but that’s another story. 

Anyway what the hell were they going to teach me if they were behaving in that manner?. In the end, kids that were marked as a problem were fighting a losing battle as they would eventually get rid while concocting some bullshit to justify their reasons for your expulsion.

It was bullying: Simple as that and what’s worse it was condoned and allowed to be delivered just like the curriculum they were teaching. 

Being treated like you did not belong was the repeated message that was sent out. 

Was I a bad kid? Maybe, maybe not.

But the real reason was they had no clue how to teach a certain type of pupil.

Labelled: I do not like to use this term but in today’s world there is a label for every single kid with an issue,  and that comes with all the help, support and guidance that you can think of. 

What would my label have been?.

Haha joke aside just give me the whole roll of labels and I will fill them in myself.

Some kids went to school thinking it was a safe space, an escape from the traumas they had at home, but it turned out to be not much different. It was just abuse delivered in a slightly different way. 

We were let down by the system, let down by the very people who were trusted by the government to educate, teach and support us.

And if I am completely honest, the bullying antics and mental abuse that was endured through these terrible school years more than likely contributed to some of the problems.

For years I thought I was naughty, disruptive, a troublemaker, a bad person; if you get told something so many times you start to believe it.

Maybe I was all of the above and maybe so many people that knew me would agree, but living through these experiences and when you are taught badly then what do you expect the end result will be?

Hearing this from the very people who were allegedly professionally trained and employed to teach you, educate you and guide you through your learning life was pretty disturbing to say the least.

I use the anger, resentment and absolute disgust I have towards these people and the abysmal education system that so many had to endure. It now motivates me and I use this as a tool to help me learn and develop myself and this now points me in a positive direction.

I have some issues. I will most likely always have some issues; however, the coping mechanisms I have in place allow me to channel these more positively and constructively. 

Believe me, what’s in my head at times no one else wants to know about. 

“Write it down, lock it away and revisit it another day”.

Everything I have learnt and achieved has been my own doing and I owe zero credit to the shambolic education system I was forced to abide by.

If I had been asked the very simple questions I might have opened up; I might have tried to explain what was going through my mind; I might have had a little more trust in people and a hell of a lot more respect for authority. 

I’m not saying that education isn’t important; what I am saying is it isn’t the be-all and end-all of your life. 

Not everyone is academic; not everyone will thrive in that environment; not everyone will stay on till 6th year to get a degree, a diploma or a master’s in whatever.

I left school with no education, no prospects and I went on to learn more out in the big wide world, I found my own path albeit it took me a while, am I perfect hell no, can I improve of course, do I have more to learn definitely, 

“Every day is a school day right up till the day you die”.

Your school years in my opinion are the most stressful years of your life trying to fit in, trying to make friends, trying to be the best you can be, unnecessary stress that should not be placed on anyone.

There is a huge world out there with lots of opportunities that can lead to good career paths. The path takes you on a journey but that journey is your journey and you will learn from your mistakes and those mistakes will make you the person you will become.

Manual labour has never done me any harm, leaving school at 14 and the negativity from the teachers only inspired me to show them that I could do it alone; I did not need them or their abysmal system.

Mathematician, historian, science major, professor of politics, every single one of those can still be achieved, but in your own time, if you do not thrive in school if you don’t go to university that’s ok; you can always do it later, when you have more of an understanding of life. And by then you most likely know who you are, what direction in life you wish to travel and the values and principles you believe in.

I’m in no way implying that you should not stick in at school; of course you should, do your best and challenge your own ability, but if you find yourself struggling, then ask for help and do not put that extra pressure on yourself. 

I encourage my daughter every single day if she doesn’t know something ask, i will do my best to help her to understand things that she isn’t sure about, explain things that she is struggling with but I always tell her that she can only do her best and that best will always be good enough for me and to be proud of what she achieved no matter what.

I was always brought up to speak up and not to accept that sort of behaviour from anyone, and well they didn’t like that did they. 

“The path you walk in life is not always your choice”

© G J Meldrum